Saturday, June 4, 2011

Life and Death

Today MacTroll and I accomplished something we've been meaning to do since we moved here.

We found ceramic hose holders because those lame plastic ones are always breaking and leaking. I indulged and got a new sprayer, too. This one works like a firefighter's nozzle. X-man spent the 96 degree day in the backyard pretending to put out fires. It worked out pretty well.

As I type this, MacTroll is trying to sleep on the couch downstairs. Riley was pretty good all day after waking me up every hour on the hour to eat grass last night. Apparently, when he does this for MacTroll, he just let's him stay outside and sleeps on the couch until the dog wants to come in (which could be an hour or more).

To me, I can't not call him back in. When he's just sitting outside, I think, "Is this the part in the nature movie where the animal wanders outside to die?"

When that happens, I don't want him to be alone. I keep pilling him and feeding him and taking him for an ever so slow walk around the block once a day.

But I know with this kind of cancer, if his spleen ruptures, it'll be over quickly. It's also weird that as I prepare my son for the inevitability, I can't look at my dog and tell him that I love him and say goodbye, yet. I keep hoping he'll be like Clawdio and come up with another life somehow. Because there's no good reason that cat should still be around... but he is.

Tomorrow's the day to make sure I get a good chat in with the dog. He'll give me that look like I'm an idiot similar to when I used to hold the phone up to his ear and MacTroll was on the other side saying hello, I know. But at the same time, I don't want to miss the moment.

Does that make any sense?

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