Why Swimming Should be More Like Running

Here's the deal. I don't really have permission to bike or run yet. I tested the "walking for exercise" waters on Thanksgiving and was depressed at the outcome. My usual 15:30/mile pace was up to 27:30/mile. Yes, I know I also had a dog who was excited about being walked around the prairie park and squawked at by pheasants, but seriously, it took me 50 minutes to walk less than two miles.

So, today, I finally stopped eating myself into a coma in self pity and took my lumpy bottom to the pool at the Y. I've been getting better swimming, and I haven't been over doing it.

What I've learned about swimming in the last couple of weeks is that swimmers like to get to the pool right when it opens and get their workout in early. They have the whole "stuff" down pat. They have their suits, their towels, their favorite shampoo and soap, hair products, make up, etc., all organized and ready to go. They scamper into the pool area, claim their favorite kickboards and pulleys and jump into a lane. Lap swimmers don't care about cold water. They just jump in and go. I'm okay with that. I can be hardcore.

But the etiquette of swim lanes at the Y is horribly disorganized. Now, usually when I swim it is during fitness classes, so they usually have 4-6 lanes open for lap swimmers on a weekday morning, which means most of the world is at work, except for stay at home parents, retirees, and folks who work different shifts (or are lucky enough to have some vacation/flex time at their jobs). I usually find someone who is swimming around my speed, sit down on the side of the lane opposite of the one they're using, make eye contact and either verbally ask (usually if they're doing the breast stroke) or point to the lane. The other person nods and I jump in and off I go.

But this morning on a weekend and after a fattening food-focused holiday, was ridiculous. The pool opens at noon, which I hate. Do you know how much more I would enjoy Sundays if rec centers and businesses were open at 9 a.m.?

Anyway, I got changed and limped my way into the pool to see the lifeguards moving swimmers out of lanes. They apparently didn't read the schedule that said that 4 lanes were for the swim team this morning and 4 lanes were for lap swim.

I sat down at the end of the lane and the woman in it swam near me. I asked if I could join her and her reply was, "My sister's coming. I'm sharing with her."

I explained that they were closing 4 lanes so we'd have to all buddy up, possibly have three to a lane and swim rotation. She looked -- unhappy.

So I decided not to push the issue and ended up at the end of the pool with a 12 year old thinking she was teaching a 5 year old to swim and a retiree doing the sidestroke.

And this is when I wish swimming was more like running. When I run at the track, there are posted directions on which way to go. There's a recommendation for where slow people should go versus fast people. At the armory they have two walking lanes, two jogging lanes and two running lanes. I'm usually in the outside jog lane, because I'm slow. When I swam at the ARC outside last summer, they had the same kind of idea. They had four lanes open for swimming 1 slow, two medium and one fast. I go to the slow lane. The Y totally needs to implement something like this. Because at the Y, I'd be in a medium lane.

What I like about running is that all it takes is a pair of tennis shoes, and if I'm feeling very spoiled about necessities -- my iphone with headphones. You give me those two things and I can go forever. I can go outside my house and just move my body and listen to the music. Sure, from time to time, I have to look out for cars, but the path near our house requires me to cross three streets. I can do that without losing too much momentum.

When I'm done running, I'm sweaty and spent. I'm also high as a kite. I get home, suck back some water and hit the shower.

When I'm done swimming, I'm wet and tired, but I'm also hungry. Starving. But I don't need to eat, otherwise what I burned off will have meant nothing. Because I don't burn as many calories swimming as I do running.

But when I swim, my foot doesn't hurt. The minute I stand on the concrete pool floor and walk up the steps using the bar assists, I know it's going to be a while before I run. It makes me sad. I like to swim. But I like to choose to swim. I hate being forced there. I hate the disorganization of swimming at the Y. I hate that although my heart feels like it could swim forever at my non-Olympic pace, I get bored. I hate that I often lose track in my head of what I'm swimming in my workout because I could care less. It's like I'm just doing my time until I get my feet back.

I'm a runner in water. And I wish I knew how to change things so that I loved it.

Tis The Season

After a day of nothing much of anything (I cleaned out the store room and X-man and MacTroll played Lego Batman 2), we went downtown to the Parade Of Lights.

We ran into Quigs and her family, and some other folks we we hadn't seen in a while. It was lovely. MacTroll waited in line in Aroma for their "special" of hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies.

The parade was smaller this year. I remember when it used to go out and run by West Side Park. This year it was just a big circle from the Orpheum parking lot around downtown and back. It was also renamed the "Bag" parade. A woman was walking around giving kids plastic bags to put things in. Now at the Candy Parade in September, I understand this. Even at Tolono Fun Day a small bag for all the candy being tossed out is needed. But pretty much the only candy that is tossed at the Parade of Lights are Candy Canes, which hit the ground and break into a million pieces...

Or, if you're unlucky, and not looking, you get beaned in the side of the head by people tossing them from inside their cars pulling their floats. Thank goodness for winter hats.

We saw some odd behaviors this parade season, too. Like the guy driving the car for 92.5 the Chief had had an infant and a toddler in the car with him... in the front seat and not in car seats. I get that the car is going 2 mph, but really?

Then we had a Grinch on a Segway who made the mistake of baking up and almost ran over a 2-3 year old who had scampered away from his parents to try and pick up candy in the road.

The Garcia's Pizza Guys came by. They were in their hot air balloon basket and every once in a while they'd let the flame run. We all kept peering closely wondering if they'd pull the cord and burn down one of the street trees.

Then the Vermillion Airport Authority came by. MacTroll loves their slogan, "Gateway to Danville." They really need to call Disney about paying them to use Phineas and Ferb...

What I found most interesting was how many of the floats were put together by cities from outside of Champaign Urbana. It was Fisher this and Rantoul that. Hoopeston high school band played.  It was curious. Lots of beauty queens having a chance to wear their crowns.

But I guess it's really the Christmas season now... I'm even hanging up stockings.

Chilling Out on Black Friday

MacTroll seems to have rebounded from his night-time illness. He's been in bed all day, but is thinking some Flattop might just be the best dinner ever. (I think he just wants to be close to Cocomero -- if it's even open -- and the movie store.)

I've been hanging out writing Christmas cards all day, except for one outing I took with my Mom to the Art Co-op in Urbana. I figured the market would be less busy today on Black Friday than tomorrow during the Holiday Market and "buy local" drive.

I picked up a canvas on sale and some blue tempera paint. The plan was to take the snowflakes he had been cutting out of notepad paper with Aunt Melissa on Wednesday and to glue them on a blue painting. But, of course, once he saw the canvas, he brain had another idea.

So besides three kinds of poster paint, we had fancy tape, glitter glue and oil pastels. About two-thirds of the way through he asked me to work on it with him. So I did. When the paint dries we're going to smear some sealant-like stuff on it to keep it from peeling off of the canvas.

Right now, he has two neighborhood children over playing Lego Batman in the basement. He plays so nicely with both of them. They're 5 and 9, and I love them a lot. There's constant giggles coming out of the basement.

Meanwhile black dog and blonde dog are wrestling on the living room carpet getting covered in dog spit. Maya, the fuzzy cat, is lying in my lap at the computer. And I am 3/4 of the way done with my holiday cards. Woot!

It was lovely until...

Our Chicken New Year (as X-man renamed Thanksgiving) was pretty low key. It consisted of my sister, my parents and my cousin coming to dinner. My dad brought X-man a deck of Star Wars Villains playing cards, and he managed to wipe the floor with Papa, Mom and Dad at War and Go Fish (that is after we all sat down and discussed what movies each of the villains came from). He also played a little wii Batman 2 with MacTroll and some sports with me. But I liked being just around the corner listening to him from time to time talk to other adults. He was in a good mood the whole time.

He ate the bison MacTroll grilled, and the salad I made. He liked the owl ice cream cake I picked up for him at Marble Slab, just in case he considered the dessert my stepmom brought to be too adult (it was delicious chocolate cheesecake!).

I turned on Pixar's Brave a bit later after everyone who wasn't at our house left, and my sister and mom had gone to bed (before 8 p.m.). It was a bit of a wrong move, because X-man was very upset by it. The whole movie is wrought with tension between mother and daughter and there's a time crunch crisis. It did help that I could fast forward through the "bad stuff" which made it a very short movie.

However, it's now 3 a.m., I just woke after having a dream where it was nighttime and I was stuck in traffic and I was late to pick up my son from somewhere. I couldn't get to him, and then I didn't know where he'd be after the pick up time.

And now MacTroll is vomiting in the downstairs toilet. I think I'll go sleep in X-man's bed. Poor MacTroll.

Update 3:48 a.m. And now he's sawing logs...

504 Plan Meeting

Today, Joel and I had a 504 plan meeting at Xander's school. The meeting was initiated by us after Xander's handwriting issues came to light and the fact that he's starting to get socially ostracized at school again and his teachers reported that he falls apart crying repeatedly during the day as a result of his social anxiety.

At the meeting were his two classroom teachers, the school special education director, the school psychologist, a speech therapist, a special education curriculum coordinator, the assistant principal, another first grade teacher and us. The school team had done several observations of Xander looking at different areas of development. Everyone was in agreement that Xander has developmental delay issues that cause social issues, handwriting issues, spatial issues and fidgeting/sensory issues.

His constant fidgeting, nose picking, biting on his fingers, picking at his clothes, etc., are getting worse. He no longer uses his purple fidget appropriately in class, so we are looking for other options for him, like putting velcro under his desk so he can touch that, and putting bands on his chair so he can push his feet against them (he has a habit of constantly tipping his chair back). They'll also be creating boundaries (like a square section where he sits on the carpet) and giving him a flexible stool so that he can still move, but will know where all of his body parts will need to be contained. This might also alleviate all of his picking at his socks and shoes if they're on the floor and he's sitting up.

These aren't discipline issues. He appears to lack the executive function ability in his brain to stop these habits or regulate his intensity of emotions. Thinking that you can use discipline to cure him of his issues is pretty much the equivalent of thinking you can cure someone of being gay or beat someone into being developmentally normal. Xander is not neurotypical for his age. The anxiety he feels has begun to manifest itself in some sensory defensiveness according to his occupational therapy evaluation. So, we have been purchasing special seamless socks and cutting tags out of clothing items, when needed. It's not all the time, but usually he's kind of amped up before school, so that's when shoes suddenly feel too tight and underwear tags pain him, etc.

One of the social workers will be going into his classroom to talk about how children are different. The teachers have identified that for the most part, kids are pretty sympathetic, but that doesn't mean any of them want to make X-man their friend. They avoid him. But the teachers do say that there are children in their class that will try to provoke him when the teachers are not looking to get him to react/cry because they know he's different. The teachers have tried to have him work with 22 of the 23 children in the class as a partner in learning (reading activities/math activities) and they have identified only one child that he is able to be consistently successful with. On the playground, he will sometimes play in a small group (if they play tag) and he does follow directions, but he does get easily overwhelmed by group activity or by his emotions when he wants to play something that the group doesn't want to play. His communications and relations with adults, however, are very clear.

He'll be going to the social thinking/Zones of Regulation group twice a week and will continue with the handwriting group once a week, in addition to his behavioral therapy with April and his handwriting with Kim (our Occupational Therapist) out of school. 

We meet again, as a group, on Jan. 22. If things aren't responding to the 504 plan, we'll probably try to develop an IEP, which is tricky because there are specific parameters for a child to fit in to get one and the "educational" consideration to get one with his issues would be under "autism." X-man's difficulties, according to my reading, mirror three different developmental disorder possibilities: autism/asperger's, PPD-NOS and Gifted. The school label does not mean anything in a clinical setting. It's just the best way to get him the services he needs, and right now, it's often difficult to be labeled "Gifted with a learning disability" in a public school setting anywhere. In fact, often children who perform at grade level standards don't get selected for services, because technically, despite whatever learning disability or disorder they have they are seen as functioning within normal perimeters on a cognitive level.

The handbook for doctors that determine these diagnosis and the requirements are changing in May 2013. Asperger's and most of the kids identified as PDD-NOS will no longer be on the spectrum because they usually usually have normal cognitive abilities. Instead, they'll have to be rediagnosed as having a social/communication disorder (which we won't know the specifics of until it is released).

So what's the difference between a 504 plan and an Individual Educational Plan (IEP)? Both plans are supported by the federal government and must be acknowledged in every state. However, a 504 plan is for individuals who have less issues than someone with an IEP. The idea is that with the appropriate minimal accommodations and interventions the child will be able to be successful in the classroom with a 504 plan. With an IEP, it's recognized as a much longer road. If we move to California both plans will move with him, the difference is that with a 504 plan, the new school district will implement Illinois' plan but will immediately initiate a 60-day review and may make changes and revisions as they see fit. With an IEP, they have to follow the goals exactly as in the plan. From what I've read last night, the plan is usually in place for about 3 years.

If in January, we don't think there's been enough beneficial movement forward, we'll be working on an IEP, which means the school district will need another 60 days to complete their reviews/observations. In that regard, we'll be putting the house up for sale more at the end of March than the beginning to make sure we have everything ready and in hand in case we sell early.

But that's how the meeting went. There were no surprises, and everyone was very supportive and on the same page. His teachers are amazing. They're very honest about his needs and open to helping him any way they can. We are very thankful for them. 

Cold When It's Not

I've been in the pool a few times over the last week. Yesterday, I attended the Deep Water class at the Y. I love the instructor. I find that water classes for the most part tend to be where three groups of people work out: the old, the overweight and the injured. I am a triple threat and meet all three criteria. By the end of the class, I wasn't as tired as I was the week before when I started. I also had more flexibility in my right calf/ankle/foot than I normally do. Now if only I could remember to take my hairbrush with me so that I could successfully shower at the Y.

Anyway, I left the Y yesterday unshowered and ran some errands. I felt cold and knew I needed a new jacket, so I went inside Champaign Surplus.

Now, it's not really cold outside, but swimming lowers your body temperature. Just think 98.6 degree me in 75 degree water for an hour. I'm usually plenty warm during the cardio part, but when we slow it down and use the water dumbbells, that's when I start to shiver and shake to try to stay warm. I will admit that sometimes, I have to get out before the stretching part because I just can't take the chill any more. My lips are sometimes blue, and I'm shaking until I get toweled off and get my clothes off, even if I stand under a hot shower after class for a little while.

I have now learned that shopping when cold is a bit like shopping at the grocery store when hungry. I was trying on every furry, sherpa, fleecy warm jacket, when in reality, what I needed was a decent fall coat. I found a coat, but at the last minute found this sweatshirt and made the mistake of touching it. It was outrageously soft, warm and comforting. So I added it to my coat. Then I decided that MacTroll and X-man needed them, too. So I wandered over and found soft, fuzzy things for them.

On the way home, I tried to justify my purchases as holiday gifts, but by then it might be too cold for them to wear. So instead, I busted them out when I got home and presented them to the boys. MacTroll looked at me like I was weird, as I insisted he took his sweatshirt off that got all raggedy from frequent washings. X-man's fall fleece was looking that way, too.

But now we're all fleeced up -- and totally snuggle worthy.

Apparently, my child isn't the only one with sensory issues. :-)

X-man's Influential Literature Library

We've been working a lot on self-acceptance and learning through social stories at our house this fall. X-man gets so moved by certain children books that sometimes he cries out of joy, other times he sobs in sadness, and more often than I like, he asks me to shut the book or skip pages because the storyline makes him nervous or scared. "One" by Kathryn Otoshi is one of the books that he always goes back to when he feels insecure. It makes him feel better about the world, and empowered to know that he can make a difference. He also likes that he can talk about how there are less bullies than one might think. In fact, most of the characters in the book are confused, scared and unsure about what to do to solve a community bullying problem. The hope from finding someone who might be afraid of standing up to the bully, but knows it's the right thing is a big deal.

So, when I found Otoshi's second book in the series, "Zero," on the shelf, I bought it immediately. It's about a number that wants to change who he or she is because he or she envies things in other people that he or she doesn't have. This is something else that is rampant in our house. It inspired us to take another look at all the good things we have in our lives, and remember why we rock.

Todd Parr is amazing. I have loved the social constructs in his books forever. I like that his crazy drawings to get to be themselves, that they eat macaroni in the bathtub, that Mommy's work and stay home, that some families have two daddies, or one parent or that children might live with their grandparents. It's Okay to Be Different really focuses in on how diverse humans are and why we should not only be okay with ourselves, but we should be okay with others' differences, too.

X-man is a sleuth. He wants to figure out what he doesn't understand and social situations challenge him. I found this book through the library system before he started with April Keaton. During X-man's second meeting with her, she came out and said, "He said he just read this at home with you." I smiled. This weekend, X-man had a play date with a new friend. The Mom stayed and she and I got to talking. It turns out that one of the elementary schools in town teaches their entire school about social thinking, because it helps everyone with what to do in social situations (bullying, teasing, communicating effectively and respectfully, etc.). For a moment, I was a bit jealous of that school, because maybe, just maybe there'd be more understanding for a child who is different in a more educated environment. CB has a social thinking class this year, but it's limited to just those that have special needs. It's a step in the right direction, but there could be more. Michelle Garcia Winner lives in Northern California. So here's hoping we get to do more with her work when we move.

 My mom read "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day" to me when I was a child. It was a story that sometimes I'm allowed to read to X-man and sometimes I'm not. He gets sad for Alexander and gets worked up at how absolutely rotten his day is going. But at the same time, X-man understands that everyone has days like that. Days that suck because of bad luck and bad choices, and that tomorrow is a new day.

 We liked reading "The Art of Miss Chew" and "I Gotta Draw" because they're both books about children who learn differently from the majority of their classmates. They're also books about how teachers who are open-minded and able to adapt for their students can get some awesome results, that not only help children learn but make them happy about going to school.

We have been reading Violet the Pilot since X-man was three. Violet is a mechanical genius and none of her peers in her school want to hang with her. Her parents are amazingly supportive of her endeavors and encourage her (while also trying to set a few safety boundaries), but her only real friend is her dog and her brain. Even though she's ostracized at school, it doesn't affect her ability know what's right and what's wrong, and she self-sacrifices something she wants to save the lives of others in her community when she sees them in a state of distress. 

For a while, X-man was having some trouble following Ms. Frizzle's encouraging words in all the Magic School Bus books about learning through mistakes. He would often not try something because he was petrified of getting it wrong. He thought it made him a bad kid for not being the best at everything. He's chilled a lot between kindergarten and first grade with being anxious about showing vulnerability. He's become more accepting of himself and others. But in the heat of it knowing that there were other kids that were restricting their life experiences out of fear of error was fundamental in him learning to accept that he's human and that no one expects him to be perfect at everything.

X-man's librarian read him Memoirs of a Goldfish last year when he was in kindergarten. It's the story of an only goldfish who relishes his only-fish existence, until his owner decides to make his life a bit more interesting by invading his bowl with other elements and neighbors. Goldfish is very slow to warm to the idea of his quiet life being invaded by others. They make him anxious and unsure, but in the end, he figures out that he understands that his life has become richer with those others in it than when it was just him in a bowl of water. 

Julia Cook is this generation of parents "What do do" lady. We read X-man her "Teeth are Not for Biting" and other books when he was a toddler. And now she's moved on to more advanced social issues for the elementary school-aged. She has a book for almost every social issue your child might face (kicking, hitting, using words, etc.)