Sunday, May 5, 2013

Back in the Saddle

I just finished the Couch to 5k, Week 5, Run 3. I've been doing the Free NHS.uk podcasts on my phone and then uploading the workout to MapMyFitness. 

Today's workout was walk 5 minutes, run 20 minutes, walk 5 minutes. Before this, the longest interval I'd done was 8 minutes. But since I haven't really been able to run in two years, it felt -- wonderful. Except I have to admit that my brain seems all messed up about the whole thing. I know physically I can run for 20 minutes. I mean, I've been doing it on an Arc Trainer for the last six months, and I've gone through 60 minute Body Attack classes. I can jump in the pool and swim for 45-60 minutes, no problem.  Cardiowise, and breathing wise, I'm fine. In my head, though. I'm scared.

I know that my PT said that she'd recommend running not be my main everyday exercise routine. I'm going to be on a bike or in exercise class for at least two of my five cardio days. Given my biomechanics and injury issues, I'm not meant to withstand long time periods on concrete. But there's just something about getting -- outside that I love. I've missed it.

In a way, I think I've missed that more than the running, because I have to admit at 15 minutes into the run portion, I knew that I could finish it, but I didn't want to. My body isn't to the point where I finish and feel amazing. It's at the point where I finish and feel tired. 

But my brain does something else. It looks at my body differently when I look in the mirror. I don't dwell on what it looks like... because I ran. I used it. It got me not just from point A to B (like walking does), but it made me sweat and made my body feel used in a good way. 

When I don't run, I look at my body with a sense of bewilderment. What am I supposed to do with this girl, now? When I run, I feel like I've done what I'm supposed to do. And it pretty much doesn't matter what size the body is, it can move. It can go. It wasn't just sitting. 

So I've got three more weeks to this program, and then I'm going on to the Runner 10k App ($3.99) on the iTunes store. And then I think I'll be a 10k girl, 3x a week. 


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