Sunday, March 8, 2009

Yeah, He's My Kid

X-man was around 12 months old the first time an acquaintance actually saw him with my husband. Her response, "Oh, he makes sense now."

What she meant was that standing next to me, X-man and I don't look too related. Mostly because besides the structure of his eyes, the fact that his ears lobe and that he doesn't have a monobrow (all pretty good traits to get from my genetic code) he looks exactly like his father.

But yesterday was X-man's third birthday party, where I watched, with great anxiety, my son emulate me in ways that pretty much felt like someone taking a baseball bat to my head. 

He was so excited about his party and the arrival of Nana that he couldn't nap, which is never good, but in a situation like this makes things 10 times worse. Then when we were getting into the car to go to the party, he stalled. He wouldn't look at me in the eye. He was having a quiet internal freak out where pretending to fill the air on the tires on my bike seemed way safer than going to a party in his honor. I hugged him and asked him if we was worried. He insisted he was happy.

But when everyone arrived... he started to cry. Every 10 minutes. Like clockwork. He melted down. 

He didn't want to share. He didn't want people looking at him. He didn't want other kids touching him. And unfortunately, kids he's most loving to -- namely the Wonder Twins -- got the brunt of the birthday anxiety. He didn't want to be the center of attention. He suddenly wanted to find a quiet corner and have some alone time. And I didn't know how to get him through it. After some awesomely designed cake from the Cake Artist's Studio, he finally settled down and seemed to be in a better mood. It helped that MacTroll sat with him in his lap while they had cake and some fruit. And let's face it, sugar is a great equalizer for kids. At least the pushing and the tackling stopped...

After the party, when the room was cleaned up, we got in the car and went home. I was wiped. I could hardly think. MacTroll said when he signed the room release so we could get our deposit back that the woman said to him, "That's the quietest 3-year-old birthday party I've ever heard."

I think her nose probably grew a foot when she got into her car. :-)

Of course, this morning he's all happy to see his toys and balloons and to play with his Nana. And it looks like it's going to be a glorious day to try out his new T-ball set in the yard, while Mom scoops a whole winter of dog poop up.

A really big thank you to all the parents and kids that were patient with him yesterday. I swear he's not a spoiled brat. He just isn't used to everything focusing on him. He's much more comfortable as part of a pack hierarchy, where he's not the top dog, but he does have some good attributes. Like group hugger. He's a great hugger.

5 comments:

Quigs78 said...

He was fine! And it's birthday, he can do what he wants! :)

And regardless of how great any kid is, lack of nap shoots it all to hell. (But my kid had a nap and was still a PITA at the party, so I have no excuse.) :P

Anonymous said...

It was a wonderful party and X-man did a great job. And I am sure that the "Wonder Twins" (as in "I wonder what the hell they will do next") did every bit as much of giving as they did taking (probably more giving). Whatever scuffles they may have had were probably everyone taking a turn being the most 3 year old-ish! I totally sympathized with X b/c I still hate being the center of attention - very stressful. He did a very good job. And you and Joel did an awesome job!

libbygirl said...

It's a rule that the birthday boy or girl is going to have a hard time at their party. period. I do like the idea of a morning party though so at least lack of nap won't be a problem. Seriously great party! You will be a great early ed teacher.

The Fearless Freak said...

Loosey, the party rocked. The cake was super fab (as I well know, since I not only scarfed my piece but MT's too when she abandoned it) and the decorations were out of this world (*snicker*).

X-man was fine. Kids scuffle and I don't think anyone was overly upset by it. Everyone seemed to have a good time and all the parents know that no nap and group settings aren't a good combo but there is no way to force a kid to nap. We all have been there with our own kids.

Anonymous said...

G is uncomfortable at her own parties, too. She talked about her last one for weeks, and then when the big day finally came, she had no idea what to do. Even today when guests arrive at our house (and by "guests" I mean grandma and grandpa), she runs and hides.

Both the girls hate when everyone sings the happy birthday song to them. I have pics of both of them at their first birthday parties shedding huge crocodile tears as a cake with a lit #1 candle sits in front of them.

I think this is totally normal. And in a way, kind of sweet.

--Denise