Assumptions and Stupidity

Yeah, I'm going to rant here and send probably the seven people who read my blog into cardiac arrest because I'm going to use the non-identifying, yet all accusing "you" in my sentences... and I'm going to do it as a list, so I don't forget anything.

1) Relationships are not all the same. What happened in your relationship isn't indicative of what will happen in others'. Just because you spend every moment of every day with your significant other and think that your relationship is healthy does not mean the fact that my husband travels extensively for work is unhealthy. It's just different. That's all.

2) Just because you know everything about your significant other's work life from the minute he or she punches in, to where the car is parked in the lot, to the major clients the company works with and like to parlay this information as if you, too, are employed by the company, doesn't mean that every employee's significant other is that involved, too. I have no idea what company my husband is visiting or sometimes even what state he is in. He has a habit of visiting 3-4 cities at a time in 5 days -- sometimes 2-3 weeks out of the month. I don't have the brain power to do that while I'm trying not to burn down my house as I cook dinner. 

3) Don't assume I have any power over where my significant other goes or doesn't go. People for some reason think I'm this complete control freak who bosses MacTroll around. I have no control over what he does or doesn't do for you. I only have control over what I do. Don't IM me and ask me what he's doing or if I can ask him to call you. If you have a grievance to file, do it with him... but I gotta tell you, I've got about 17 years worth of grievances filed ahead of you for him to address when he gets a free moment to focus on that kind of stuff, so you better get used to waiting. MacTroll goes where MacTroll wants to go. He says what he wants to say. He is the controller of his calendar. If you don't get what you want -- go talk to him and leave me out of it.  

4) If someone loves you enough to try and help you function when you're not functioning. Don't freaking take her head off. I don't care if you've had a shitty day. It makes her much, much less likely to want to do anything for you in the future. No matter how much she loves you. 

5) If you've been insulting to me and you go to apologize for your own jerkiness. Don't then follow up the apology with a, "Do you just not feel well?" implying that you really think there's something wrong with me and not your behavior. It completely voids your apology. You were a jerk. And now, you're an effin' jerk.

6) Boys play with dolls. Girls play with action figures. Boys sometimes like to dress up in dresses. Girls sometimes like to run around with their shirts off. Boys can wear pink if they want to. Girls can play in the mud and be gross and dirty. It's fine. There's nothing wrong with it. Just because you were nurtured one way and grew up with all kinds of closed mindedness about such things does not mean you should pick on your children or other people's children and try to shame them into holding your same sexist standards. My kid has a baby. The baby's name is Annika. The baby is a boy. The baby sleeps in a pink bassinet. He gets pushed around in a black and magenta stroller. X-man is learning to love and care for something through the same attachment-based ways he learned to love his parents. Seriously, step off. If I hear one more person say something about how boys won't like or will be embarrassed by having "girl" toys or vice versa, I'm gonna scream. Have you not seen this from 1974? You sound like an outdated moron when you say shit like that.